LADIES NIGHT
@ THE MAXUM NIGHTCLUB
Grand Rapids, MI - Wednesday, July 21st 2004 - 103 Pics
Whoop! Whoop! I hung out with DJ Corey Hart and got my wizzaste on. And then my camera took a sh*t so I was like "F*ck this." and left. I think my camera was pissed at me for taking all those wet boxer brief pics. My camera is so sensitive!
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Aye yi yi
I didn't think it was possible to act like more of a beligerant horses ass than I did last Saturday night. Well last night with blinding efficency I proved that it WAS possible. So to the people I was cool to, thanks. To the people that i was a cocky beligerent loud mouth arrogant smart ass prick asshole f*ckface bastard to. Please accept my deepest apologies. To my friends that looked out for me. Thank you. Needless to say it is time to slow that sh*t down.

The tally... (3PM-2AM)
ADAM'S WEENY ROAST
7 beers
6 jager bombs
HOME
double 101 proof bourbon
CRUSH
2 red headed sluts
TAPS
1 red headed slut
1 double jack and coke
MARGARITA GRILL
3 red headed sluts
1 jager bomb
2 corona's
CRUSH (Late addition)
It turns out I hi-jacked Jessie's mixed drink on Saturday too. My bad! Sorry bro!

ATTENTION!!!
My cellphone was obliterated in a freak smelting accident on Saturday night. So I have no phone / caller id right now. If you have called me over the weekend, call me again and leave me your number and name. If you haven't called me over the weekend, call me anyway and leave me your name and number. This sucks! 616-485-2473
-two eagles marcus

p.s. If you saw me on Saturday, please accept my apologies for being a beligerant horses ass.

COLLEGE NIGHT
@ CRUSH NIGHTCLUB
Grand Rapids, MI - Sunday, July 18th 2004 - 154 Pics
I wasn't like partyin' on Sunday, so Frederick held it down for me with the pics. Thanks FP!
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THE RIDE HOME
Grand Rapids, MI - Saturday, July 17th 2004 - 49 Pics
(<---Susannah.) So I catch a ride with Dj Corey Hart over to Taps where I thought I was re-connecting with Chris O. and he drops me off and bounces and then I am like staggering around in front of Taps for like 10 minutes mumbling to myself "Where the f*ck is Chris O." So I dial Chris O. up and I am like... "Where the f*ck are you?" and he is like... "Dood. I told you I was out. " So I'm like... "Oh shit you did! I'm smizzashed and I forgot, now I'm stranded!" So I call Corey and I am like "Dood, come back!" and he was like... "I am halfway home Bizzitch! But okay." Little did I know that in the meantime my call set-off a chain of calls between Chris O., Ian Belanger and Dj Corey Hart to make sure I didn't get abducted by aliens or some Renegade Amish Freedom Fighters. The Dj's in this town are some down ass muthas. Word.
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SATURDAYS
@ CRUSH NIGHTCLUB
Grand Rapids, MI - Saturday, July 17th 2004 - 88 Pics
Boom, change of venue. We rolled into Crush and once again it was on! As usual we walked in and it was nothin' but love! So many friends so little time. We milled around to the sound of DJ Corey Hart, had some more bevi's and did the damn thing, I was smizzashed and Chris O. was like... "Here's my car keys, I am outta here." I was like "Cool." So I stayed and partied and it was all good.
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2ND FLOOR SATURDAYS
@ TAPS SPORTS BAR & NIGHTCLUB
Grand Rapids, MI - Saturday, July 17th 2004 - 118 Pics
Myself and Chris O. stormed Taps like we owned the place for more adult bevi's with Ian Belanger. The spot was packed and we were there to add a bit more insanity to the mix, which we did with much fervor. The funniest part of this Taps experience was when an enormous vinyl penis emerged from crowd and Ian Belanger enthusiastically exclaimed... "Huge f*cking penis!" and proudly took a picture. I was nearly in tears it was so damn funny. Those bachelorette's waved that thing around like Darth Vader's lightsaber. Fortunately I was able to catch up with those wild ladies before they left and put my John HanCOCK on that massive phalice. Awesome!
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SATURDAYS
@ TIKI BOB'S CANTINA
Grand Rapids, MI - Saturday, July 17th 2004 - 31 Pics
(<---Trina & Amanda. Happy Birthday Trina!) Another great start to a wild ass night! Myself and Chris O. started off at Tiki Bob's for a few adult bevi's and a few random shots and then we were off!
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ROB BASE & DJ E-Z ROCK
@ TIKI BOB'S CANTINA
Grand Rapids, MI - Friday, July 16th 2004 - 296 Pics
Friday at Tiki Bob's was pure IN-SAN-AH-TY! I was skeptical at first because Rob Base & DJ E-Z Rock are doods from like 10 years ago but Tiki's slowly got packed and around midnight BOOM! The crowd erupted when Rob & E-Z hit the stage! Those guys really know how to rock the crowd, they had the crowd's complete attention during the non-stop house rockin' set. I was throughly impressed. At the end of the night myself and Chris O. were completely wizzasted and had Kat dump us off at Steak and Shake were we became stranded for like ever until our good friend Ian Belanger came to our rescue from like across f'n town. And although he only eats twigs and berries he is still one helluva guy!
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LLYOD BANKS
@ THE ORBIT ROOM
Grand Rapids, MI - Thursday, July 15th 2004 - 90 Pics
Llyod Banks of the G-Unit rocked Grand Rapids Thursday, lots of hotties in the house, I couldn't make it because I was busy with the Chippendales @ Tiki Bob's but I had my good friend Frederick there to hold it down for me with the camera. Thanks Frederick!
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BLISS
@ CRUSH NIGHTCLUB
Grand Rapids, MI - Thursday, July 15th 2004 - 56 Pics
(<--- Meow!) I have to say that this was one of the wildest nights I have ever been witness to at Bliss. It was insanity, pure and simple. The house was packed, the music was throbbing, the ladies were hot & bothered... I love this sh*t!
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LADIES NIGHT - 2ND FLOOR
@ TAPS SPORTS BAR & GRILL
Grand Rapids, MI - Thursday, July 15th 2004 - 56 Pics
At about midnight I staggered over to Taps for a commando style photo session. I stormed the 2nd floor like Chuck Norris in the move Delta Force and preceded to take no prisoners with my spontaneous pointing and shooting. I big upped Ian Belanger before dissappearing back into the crowded space as discretely as I appeared as I made my way to The B.O.B.
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CHIPPENDALES
@ TIKI BOB'S CANTINA
Grand Rapids, MI - Thursday, July 15th 2004 - 339 Pics
(<--- Gross!) So Jason at Tiki Bob's is like... "Yeah, I want you to start coming to Tiki's and taking pics." and I'm like... "That's cool." and he's like... "The first night will be Thursday for the CHIPPENDALES." I'm like... "Uhhhh... okay. I guess." Initially I wasn't as eager to shoot the Chips as opposed to let's say... The Playboy Girls of Golf, but even though I wasn't, I had to make an attempt to be a professional. Me and Scardy arrived on the scene around 7:00pm and I made a b-line for the Krunk Juice because there was no way I was going to be able to take pictures of buff 95% naked guys without it. The evening started out kinda rough because I was pretty much sober when the guys came out swingin' their tube steaks. But eventually the Krunk Juice kicked in and the girls started going wild and all of a sudden I didn't feel so dirty and violated as I did initially. All in all it was an awesome time, I mean come on there was like 100 drunk chicks and only 15 guys in the house.
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LADIES NIGHT
@ THE MAXUM NIGHTCLUB
Grand Rapids, MI - Wednesday, July 14th 2004 - 158 Pics
I always get krunked and run around like a wild banshee on Wednesdays at the Maxum. The lighting totally rocks and helps me make my pictures real pretty, plus DJ Corey Hart always ads to the insanity by providing us with an almost endless supply of adult bevi's. Afterward we headed over to Steak-n-Shake for some late night dining with our favorite waitress Gail, although this evening she was behaving in a very strange way, it was a very funny night.
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COLLEGE NIGHT
@ TIKI BOB'S CANTINA
Grand Rapids, MI - Tuesday, July 13th 2004 - 26 Pics
(<--- Okaaaay!) We rocked out pretty casually at Billy's all night and then headed over to Tiki's at like 2am when everyone was getting kicked out. Why do you ask? I don't f'n know myself. I do know that I made a "drunk call" that night that I wasn't very excited about the next day.
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COLLEGE NIGHT
@ CRUSH NIGHTCLUB
Grand Rapids, MI - Sunday, July 11th 2004 - 90 Pics
(<---I love tongue!) I was sitting at my office working on my site when I hear this banging sound at my window, I cautiously peeked through the blinds to see Ian Belanger and Chris O. staring back at me. Those bizzatchs kidknap my ass and drag me to CRUSH totally against my will. The first stop was Taps for the grossest shot ever created, it had rumplemintze and jager in it. Basically it tasted like mouthwash mixed with sh*t. I almost f*ckin' puked.
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HAWAIIAN TROPICS BIKINI CONTEST FINALS
@ MARGARITA GRILL
Grand Rapids, MI - Saturday, July 10th 2004 - 222 Pics
Since there was such a large gap between Jimmy Le's pig roast and the bikini contest I totally lost my buzz and it took me until 2am to finally catch it again. Nice. In the meantime the contest was a fun time, lots of people in attendance, but not a whole lot of people pictures and by now you should know why.
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JIMMY LE'S 2ND ANNUAL PIG ROAST
Grand Rapids, MI - Saturday, July 10th 2004 - 106 Pics
Jimmy Le's pig roast was a very good time. Myself and Ian Belanger attended the soire, we politicked while consumning large helpings of swine and swilling foamy ass beer. Well, I consumed large helpings of swine because that puss Ian is a VEGAN so he ate twigs and berries. Before we left that sick bastard Lance wiped his pasty white ass on my car.
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COLLEGE NIGHT
@ MARGARITA GRILL
Grand Rapids, MI - Friday, July 9th 2004 - 5 Pics
I went by Tanya's house for Drew's birthday party and then cruised by Margarita. I wasn't in the mood to do my thing 'cuz I was stone cold sober, matter of fact I only know how to operate my camera when I am soused. Fortuneatly I did manage to get a couple shots of some cuties before I called it a night.
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BLISS
@ CRUSH NIGHTCLUB
Grand Rapids, MI - Thursday, July 8th 2004 - 200 Pics
(<--- Her milkshake brings all the boys to the yard!) Thursday July 8th was scandalous! It turned out to be a total bootyfest! Some girl told me that I needed to take a bunch of butt pictures and me being the easy going always willing to accomodate type of guy that I am, I was more than willing to ablige. Holla!
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JESSICA GETS HER TONGUE PIERCED
Grand Rapids, MI - Monday, July 5th 2004 - 59 Pics
So my hottie friend Jessica tells me that she is going down to Mos Isley's to get her tongue pierced. I was like "Whoa! Can I come take pictures?" So here it is, an official tongue piercing by Dave from Mos Isley's.
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The Ten Worst Things About Getting Too Drunk
We've all been to that dark and disgusting place. You know the one. The "What Was I Thinking With Those 151 Shots" hell, where you've guzzled enough alcohol to kill a zebra, and you feel like you're going to die Ð both physically, and because of all the embarrassing things you'd done the night before, all of which your friends recount for you in hideous detail. It can be hard, at times, to know when we've had enough; you're in the moment, having a blast with your friends at some nightclub, and so far, everything you've been drinking hasn't really hit you all that hard Ð a few more drinks wouldn't hurt, right? But, it always catches up with you, and you almost always wind up doing something that, when you've awoken the next morning feeling as though you'd stumped your head somehow, you don't even recall doing. Here's our list of some of the worst things that can happen to one Ð all theoretical, and not from personal experience, of course Ð after a long night of bending the old elbow:

10. You'd gone out the night before with $300 in your wallet, and when you wake up the next morning, find just 87 cents in your pocket, and a credit card receipt for a $600 bar tab.

9. You'd left your apartment the previous evening wearing a pair of boxer shorts, a nice shirt, and a pair of jeans. Somehow, you woke up wearing no shirt, a pair of khakis, and a purple, crotch-less thong.

8. Meeting Bo Derek at a nightclub, but waking up next to Bo Diddley.

7. Abusing your cell phone, and calling all the people in life you'd always wanted to tell off, but didn't have the guts to Ð also known as DUI: Dialing Under The Influence. Former flames, old roommates who always stole food from you, etc. Only, you also left a message at your job, for your boss, on their voicemail, that started off, "You know what makes you such an incompetent, lousy boss?"

6. Getting on the subway to downtown to the comfort of your bed, only to fall asleep on the train, and wake up in Coney Island.

5. Meeting an amazing man or woman you're attracted to, and then calling them 30 times that same evening and leaving them 30 answering machine messages Ð but what's worse is, you couldn't even remember what their name was, so each message starts out, "Hello. . .you."

4. Passing out on the floor of your apartment, only to wake up and realize you'd used your hands as a pillow of sorts, and now, you've got the stamps of all the clubs you'd been to plastered across your cheeks.

3. Forgetting to take your contacts out, and passing out; the next morning, they're stuck to your dehydrated-from-all-the-aperitifs-you'd-consumed eyes, leaving you no choice but to peel them off.

2. Someone bumps into you in the club, causing you to spill your entire drink; you're drunk, so "keeping it real" seems like a stellar idea Ð but the guy who bumped into you knows karate, and is a police officer.

1. You find ten messages from your friends in your email inbox the morning after a hardy night of boozing, and each one has an attachment; pictures downloaded from JoonBug.com, of you locking lips with a transvestite you thought was "the kind of woman I could settle down with." Oh, and to make matters worse, you're married.

(stolen maliciously from joonbug.com)

LADIES NIGHT
@ THE MAXUM NIGHTCLUB
Grand Rapids, MI - Wednesday, July 7th 2004 - 204 Pics
(<---Nice!) Okay, we went to the Maxum. I got totally krunked and had a fuggin' blast!
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DON'T EVER GET THIS DRUNK!
This is the most revolting thing I have ever seen. -t.e.
DOWNLOAD NOW!

SATURDAYS
@ CRUSH NIGHTCLUB
Grand Rapids, MI - Saturday, July 3rd 2004 - 12 Pics
(<---Hair that matches shirt is always intriguing.) I got majorly krunked over at the Grill and somehow managed to make my way back over to the Crush for a few last minute cocktails and of course a few pics of me making a fool of myself. What fun!
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HAWAIIAN TROPICS BIKINI CONTEST, pt. 3
@ MARGARITA GRILL
Grand Rapids, MI - Saturday, July 3rd 2004 - 313 Pics
(<---Okaaay!!!) So yeah, the Grill was out of control. The night was a bit slow because of the holiday weekend and massive torrential downpour, but it was a blast non-the-less!!!
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SATURDAYS
@ CRUSH NIGHTCLUB
Grand Rapids, MI - Saturday, July 3rd 2004 - 6 Pics
(<---Rummi gone wild! ) I hit the Crush early for some pre-bikini contest krunk juice, took a few gems of Rumalda and then slid over to the Grill.
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07/01/04 - Okay, I find out that they were upgrading the servers today and it wasn't some asshead that shut my site down for the day. Sorry guys.
-two eagles